Week #2 Response to Class blog

Like Michelle I grew up with parents acting within their traditional gender roles. I think this has a great effect on children who observe and essentially absorb their parents’ behavior as role models. I too was confused by my father’s expectations of my mother. Why was my mother who worked just as long hours, expected to have a healthy home made meal on the table every night? My father also never cleaned off the kitchen table, did the laundry, cared for or walked the family dog, or bothered to help us with homework. To a child one could confuse his “masculine” role of bread winner as pretty uncaring. I’m not saying this is true of all those who adhere to this gender role, but it was how I saw him as a child. I thought the dynamic was unfair and I felt badly for my mother who always put the family first, while my father seemed to put himself first. My mother kept an immaculately clean house and raised two very strong, loving, and intelligent daughters with great integrity. I would not applaud my father in the same way as my memories of him are predominantly as disciplinarian, a lay about in front of the television or as an absentee since he spent much of his time in the “man cave” of our basement. I found I looked for opposing qualities in a relationship to prevent carrying on this structure in my future family. My boyfriend cleans and cooks better than I do! He takes care of pets as though they are children. Furthermore, he is sensitive and nurturing without this having any threat to his masculinity. Sometimes I notice friends whose fathers were “tough guys” marrying a very similar type of man. I feel I’m more aware of this due to my upbringing and the gender roles played out in my family. I’m keenly aware of gender roles and am grateful for this awareness.